Another Year


Luli and Polly, 2001

On Saturday, we will celebrate Maria’s “Gotcha Day”. Sixteen years.  At this time in 2001, I was furiously tying up loose ends at FedEx-LAC to start maternity leave.  I’d go home in the evenings and open the closet where little girl dresses hung in perfect formation, at attention, waiting to be chosen.  I’d open the drawers of the dresser and pull out a sparkling white pair of skivvies and marvel at how tiny they were.  I’d stand in the middle of her room imagining.  Just imagining.

Of course, I had a lot wrong about what motherhood would be like.  Yesterday at church, Andy, the Rector, talked about reformation and transfiguration–how we are capable of reformation, that is, turning in a new direction, trying again.  But transfiguration? That’s God’s work with us.  It’s been a bit of both, I think, in the work of motherhood.  Our daughter has helped me become a better person.  March 4, 2001.  The. bestest. day. ever.

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